I’m yawning, WIDELY, so widely I could break the hinge of my jaw. At the peak of the yawn, the pressure in my ears increase to where my eardrums are probably bulging. The yawn is released, and tears roll down my cheeks. My eyelids feel heavy. My speech is slowing. I’m rolling my head side to side against the headrest of my lounge chair; my body wants me to recline – – flat. I insist on sitting up. I want to keep typing, and I need to study. This is the only valuable time I have to do what I want. This is NO TIME to sleep.
It’s only 9:39 pm. Granted, I got up at 2:00 am early this morning. (That’s because the night prior, sleep overtook me at 9 pm, making it too painful to stay up, and so I awoke at 2 am). My body is trying to do it all over again.
Now I feel pressure building up in my head. It feels heavy.
Was THAT the purpose of all that yawning? To hold in so much air and withhold oxygen it would make the vessels in my brain dilate? So it could then feel heavy? It’s uncomfortable man, now I really feel I need to lay down. I just want to slide on down. But, I’m going to fight it. I want to finish (wups, there goes another yawn, hold on).
Okay, that’s done. I want to see how far my body will go to get me down. Okay . . . now a couple of my fingers are aching a bit . . . I just felt a brief ache in my back. There goes the fourth finger again, aching. AND yet, another yawn. Now my back muscles are feeling tight like they need to be stretched. So I stretch my back. Now my upper back itches, right where I can’t reach it. Alright now, . . . that’s only going to serve to keep me awake.
I wipe the tear remnants from my cheeks …………………
For a few minutes, I felt like I was winning the battle. But now I’m aware that I had just been frozen in thought, seconds ago. My jaw was wide open, my head turned to the side, and my mind had abandoned me (just left me like that). What the— , was I asleep? Oh well, I’m out of it now. I’m awake again.
So that’s how it happens. Dirty trick. You’re in thought, and you think you’re going to stay there, next thing you know, you’re asleep without realizing it.
It happened again. I was in thought, then it dissipated, AGAIN with my jaw hanging open and my face frozen still. My back is uncomfortable again. I need to stretch or lay down. Now my scalp itches. Now my foot itches. What’s with the itching? I jiggle my leg back and forth to jolt some wakeful energy into me. But then I’m back in frozen mode. My shoulders feel cramped.
Oh, I can’t stand it anymore. This is outright painful. I’ve gotta get this computer off my lap. I’m going to lay down. Just for a few minutes. I tried! Oohhhhhh, you can’t win, not at this, let me go. . . MOVE!!! zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz